I’m not feeling well. It is discouraging, since I’ve been so careful to watch everything I eat. The Pepto Bismol bottle is almost empty. I take a quick look at the label, but nothing registers as a danger, so I drink the rest of the bottle. I think: does it really matter at this point whether there is gluten in it?
I go over everything I’ve eaten in the last few days. It was difficult to eat at the conference and be gluten free, but not impossible. The only thing I can think of that I knowingly ate with gluten in it was the Sacrament bread. I did talk with the Bishop after church on Sunday. He is willing to do whatever is needed to make it safe for me to take the Sacrament. The steps are a little intensive. The tray would need to be washed, so no crumbs are left. I would need to bring rice bread, which would have to be kept separate from the other bread, which cannot be put on the same tray. The Priest who will bless and break the bread would have to remember not to touch the other bread before the rice bread. Difficult, but not impossible.
Not knowing if what I am eating will make me sick, regardless of how careful I’m being is… well, it makes me not want to eat anything at all. Since that isn’t an option, I eat. It is comparable to walking down a hall in the dark, not sure that you’ll end up in the right place without falling down stairs or tripping on something. Tiptoeing in the dark makes me cautious.
Tomorrow is my birthday. My husband says he’ll take me out to eat. I’ve got to decide where to go… which is not as much fun as it used to be. Any suggestions?
